©  Rhoberta Shaler, PhD
www.ForWomenEntrepreneurs.com

Some days, I want to scream.  I’m sure you’ve had that experience, too. Perhaps, not for the same reason. I want to scream because I cannot believe the number of distractions people who say they are focused on building their businesses find….AND JUSTIFY! ( Oooo, that’s just put the scream up a few decibels! )

As a business consultant and executive coach, I get the urge to scream far too frequently for that one reason alone. Wonderful, well-intended people hire me to coach them to systematically clarify, construct and grow their businesses. They swear blind that they want to achieve “A”, and are frequently running after the rest of the alphabet, with carefully constructed, elaborately convoluted, reasons why!

How do you determine if you are driving yourself to distraction?

• You are not getting where you say you want to go in a meaningfully measurable way.
• You are feeling overwhelmed much of the time, too many wheels spinning and not enough hands.
• You are always attracted to new, shiny objects when what you were playing with is just becoming pliable, comfortable and useful.
• You vociferously defend your choices to stray from the mission you’ve set yourself and justify the departures loudly.

I know it is difficult to stay generally on the path. Shiny things attract. Marketing language of others beckons. Fear of “losing an opportunity,” or “leaving a stone unturned” paralyzes. Lack of confidence in your intuition and judgment wanes. Others are too ready to share their opinions of what you should do…even if you didn’t ask. There are many distractions. It is up to each one of us to calculate the cost of tempting detours in terms of time, energy, money, frustration and loss.  And, it’s up to each one of us to ‘fess up to the degree of our commitment to our missions.  Sometimes, that’s just talk, too.

One thing I know for sure…and I learned it the long, hard way: I cannot say I want one thing, do another, and hope for a satifying result. Although, I do know a few people so addicted to drama, that they wouldn’t know what to do if they didn’t have a tale of woe to tell. They love distractions, especially when they can make them someone else’s fault.  Go figure!

Thanks for letting me “scream” here!  Is it still a scream if no one is listening?

Rhoberta

Rhoberta Shaler, PhD
Consultant. Counselor. Coach. Catalyst.
Success Solutions for Life, Work & Business

www.Rhoberta.com
Escondido, CA
Follow me on Twitter:  www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShaler
Join me on Facebook:  www.profile.to/rhoberta & on LinkedIn: www.LinkedIn.com/in/rhobertashaler

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©  Rhoberta Shaler, PhD
www.ForWomenEntrepreneurs.com

So, it that old cliche true? Are good intentions unfulfilled the road to whatever you might think of as hell?

I started thinking about this while I was giving a talk on Saturday.  What triggered it was yet another woman used that phrase that perks up my ears and makes the hair on the back of my neck rise:

“I really meant to ….”

When she said it, and because it was in the context of my talk, Unwinding the Clockwork Life with Soul Solitude, I told her this story:

About five years ago I was giving an eight-week program called Optimize Life Now! and they were a great group.  As I walked across the parking lot to the class one evening, a woman who was well-known for her loud voice and approach, yelled across the lot:

“Sorry that I missed the class last week, I meant to come.” And I called back:

“No, you didn’t.”

Of course, she was taken aback because, I guess, no one had ever challenged her catch-all,  ”I meant to” line.  So, she asked what I meant…pun intended.  And, I told her:

“If something is important to you and you have decided it is a priority, you pay attention and follow-through. If it is not, you are likely to let it slip. Therefore, you did not mean to come to class, or you would have been here.”

Now, she had difficulty with that idea.  How about you?  Do you excuse yourself with “meaning to” especially when you fail to keep promises you have made to yourself? Do you accept and leave lots of wiggle room for others when they say they meant to do something they failed to do?  You’ll likely not see it quite the same way after reading this.

Now, about that road….

What do you think?

To Our Successes!
Rhoberta

Rhoberta Shaler, PhD
Consultant. Counselor. Coach. Catalyst.
…leading women entrepreneurs to the lives & livelihoods that fulfill them while making money.
www.ForWomenEntrepreneurs.com

Join my groups on Facebook & LinkedIn.  They’re easy to find just look for “For Women Entrepreneurs!”

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